The Family (Or most of them)

The Family (Or most of them)
The Family

February 13, 2008

I HAVE RETURNED...

BUT ONLY IN A MANNER OF SPEAKING.

See that handsome lad above? That's my nephew, Joshua.

See the short snowman he's with? That's me, after returning from Outer Space and the Orion Nebula.

In my last dispatch, I explained that earth's gravity and some sad circumstances had weighed my Orionesque form down to nothing more than about eight inches tall. I could barely move, much less function.

I was summoned by my planet's leaders to return for de-gravitization, a process that usually takes one earth year. But my treatments were cut short, so to speak.

My boss back here on Earth sent a text message saying he needed me here to cover an event that features rocks with handles on them, ice (of course...what else in February?) and brooms in a sport that rhymes with hurling and begins with the letter "c."

I immediately launched my spaceship back to this planet, only to return to -48C temperatures with the windchill. My body, especially in its highly gravitized state, could not handle the transition.

The result is what you see above.

But I promised a postcard or two of my travels, so here they are.

This is me using the hypertronic defibulator to blast through an oncoming meteor, thereby saving the Earth while you were all asleep.

My mother spaceship, flying into a sun.



Me in my little rover spaceship

OK, that's it. I was going to do a Valentine's Day post, but I have no time and I'm quickly melting, so I must hurry.
I'm on the road to Brandon Thursday morning for a weekend of the thing that rhymes with hurling but starts with the letter "c."
Be well. And Happy Valentine's Day.

10 comments:

  1. Until I found out about Canadians, I thought curling was something women did to their hair.

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  2. Welcome back. It's good to have you home. You never did blow me that kiss... does this mean I'll have to collect in person?

    Happy Valentine's day to you too.

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  3. I hope the earth's gravity didn't cause shrinkage elsewhere!

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  4. Ground Control To Major Tom....... safe landings......

    xX

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  5. Does this mean you were up there hangin' with Marvin?

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  6. So good to have you back on earth, WW. I hope your journey was a good one. You were missed.

    Hugs,
    L

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  7. WW, I sincerely hope there is a way to stretch you back to normal. Come back soon!

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  8. Ooh Aah! You lucky bastard!
    When you get a chance zip over to my place and I'll show you how to seduce a woman.

    You might even learn a thing or two?

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  9. Just popping in to see if your ok???

    x

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  10. Stace:

    Well, curling is something women do to their hair. It's just a lot more exciting.

    Anna:

    Ha! I have now finished my assignment and am jetting back into outer space.

    You'll have to get here soon...

    MJ:

    No, actually, the non-gravity in my home world has the opposite effect.

    Toasty:

    Landings are never a problem. It's the blasting off that tests the laws of universal physics.

    Lee:

    But I AM Marvin! And yeah, Marvin hangs out, that's all he does.

    Laurie:

    Thank you. I noticed when approaching earth's orbit that Montana has huge mountains.

    Carmenzta:

    No extracurricular stretching is necessary. All is well now, but thank you.

    Lord Tenaciousness:

    I don't think so. But your hair could do with more curling.

    Toasty:

    The Eagle has landed. He was out of town on a work assignment. All is OK.

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