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SUBTITLED: THE BIG SCREW AND THE ELUSIVE LOST NUT
So, when we left you last, I explained that a problem emerged while I cleaned and polished Florence the Fan, thereby eliminating several pounds of dust from my two-bedroom-plus-den apartment.
When I undressed -- I mean, disassembled -- Florence, I had to remove the ring that keeps her front and back covers together.
In an apparent moment of charged, passionate excitement, perhaps like fumbling with a bra fastener in the height of passion, which I have never quite been able to master, I made a mistake.
I lost the nut to the screw below. I looked high and low outside on my patio, but could not find it.
So rather than taking 10 minutes to go to the local hardware store to find my nut, I spent the next hour or so retrieving all of my tool boxes, screw and nut storage cabinets and other sources to find the right replacement nut.
All of these things are located in a gigantic box in my storage room. Living in an apartment, I don't need them, of course. But because of my lack of care in disassembling Flo, I made a horrific boo-boo.The cabinet above was my first place to look for a nut that could fit the screw. I couldn't find one. I was distraught. The next series of pictures, as you will see, made my search for a nut even more upsetting.
I never did find a nut that fit the screw that came with Flo. However, I did find a longer screw -- a MUCH longer screw -- that was a bit wider and for which I DID find a nut. That picture is below.
So in the picture below, after finally getting Flo back together and lying prone on the floor with me over top of her, I declared victory.
Having done that, I plugged her back in and got her going again by flicking her switch. She was humming like a charm. I realize the pic below is sideways, but get over it. Turn your head to the left 90 degrees.
So here she is in full splendor.
The shot below is in fact an action shot of her blowing at full speed. In fact, she has three speeds, she's quite a fan of mine. And she goes back and forth if I press a button, but she doesn't go up and down.
I never did find a nut that fit the screw that came with Flo. However, I did find a longer screw -- a MUCH longer screw -- that was a bit wider and for which I DID find a nut. That picture is below.
So in the picture below, after finally getting Flo back together and lying prone on the floor with me over top of her, I declared victory.
Having done that, I plugged her back in and got her going again by flicking her switch. She was humming like a charm. I realize the pic below is sideways, but get over it. Turn your head to the left 90 degrees.
So here she is in full splendor.
The shot below is in fact an action shot of her blowing at full speed. In fact, she has three speeds, she's quite a fan of mine. And she goes back and forth if I press a button, but she doesn't go up and down.
Geez... loose screws and no nuts... doesn't sound good. HA!
ReplyDeleteGlad you found a replacement part for Florence so that she can resume her duties in your bedroom. She looks pretty spiffy too.
Can only hope the tub looks the same.....
aaaah, success!
ReplyDeletedude, you have too many screws and things...
Yer screwed.
ReplyDeleteThat blows.
Now I have laughed harder than I have in many months. When I see all those sectional boxes I was to pull each one out and see what you have. Of course I would have found the nut immediately....::hip shake::
ReplyDeleteWonderful little story.
Soft love,
T
Ponygirl:
ReplyDeleteWell, it may not sound good, but it is what it is. The tub is as shiny white as I could make it.
Flo is, indeed, floating in ecstasy. However, now that it has cooled down, I've turned her off.
Angel:
Umm, you can never have TOO many screws.
MJ:
I am and it sure does.
Tara:
I'm glad to have brightened your day. You're invited to pull and see what I have any time.
Of course you would have found the nut immediately. Thanks for the hipshake.
This is not within without writing, but rather the Out-of-town Visitor of the week (see right-hand sidebar, i.e. brother Doug from Ottawa).
ReplyDeleteI think brother ww should have spelled "segue" with an accent over the last "e", as the French word is spelled (I would correct the thing, but he doesn't know how to do it with this keyboard, and neither do I). A small thing, I know, but let's not overlook the French influence on the English language, EH?
Funny about fan dust. I have two of them covered in same and when my gf and I moved into our new house a few weeks ago, she said I could not use them until I cleaned them. I agreed to do so (they are pretty disgusting to look at), but haven't gotten to it yet-- maybe spring cleaning next February. Oh yeah-- she also has dust allergies.
Ponygirl: I like the name "Flo" but I don't think ww got the second reference you may have had in mind-- as in "flow" of fan air. Re the bathtub-- it's real clean too. WW tells me to stop now, so I will indulge him.
Doug: Hi and welcome!
ReplyDeleteYou threw me for a loop.... guess I didn't read the first bit thoroughly and thought WW had found someone and moved in with her! And didn't tell any of his blogger fans the news!
And, yes, I was referencing "air flo" with Florence's nickname.
PG:
ReplyDeleteOh, give me a break. I told you about me and Flo. I'm not going to disclose absolutely EVERYTHING!
My brother is anal, unlike me (ha ha ha ha!) He's got a big brain and is one of those people who says, "but one can blah blah blah..."
WW: Well, I already knew about you and Flo.... I thought this was someone else... a threesome, perhaps? Didn't seem quite like you, so I did a double take.....
ReplyDeleteYou've got a big brain too... don't sell yourself short... but definitely not the anal type. And therein lies the difference..... so he'd be the smart one... and you're the smart ass, right?! HA HA HA!
Doug, you can put the e with the accent by holding down the Alt key and hitting 1 3 0 (consecutively, not all at once) on the numeric pad, and then releasing the Alt key.
ReplyDeleteSo Flo got upgraded to a bigger screw - lucky girl!
PG:
ReplyDeleteWell, I may have a little thing going with one of the other inanimate objects in my dressing room, but that's private.
Some would call me a smart ass, yes....
Anna:
I'll make sure Doug reads your helpful French maid hint about accentez-goo's.
But I may have to shield his eyes from reading your other comment. He IS my younger, naive brother.
I don't know how Doug could be naive, having YOU for a brother.
ReplyDeleteI'd bet he's just as much of a smart ass as you are. Considering what we have seen of Gerry on here, it seems to be genetic.
Hope you are having a great visit with him while he is here.
And also glad that Flo is fully functional, now that you've got her totally screwed up. It is supposed to warm up again this week, so I am sure you will make use of her particular talents soon.
A FANscinating and 'exhaustive' look into your troubled, little, world of isolation and make believe.
ReplyDeleteJudging by your extensive helter-skelter assortment of nuts it would be safe to assume that you were a Pack Rat in a previous incarnation.
PG:
ReplyDeleteThe smart-ass gene within the males of our family tree seems to have evolved to combat and counter-balance the cheekiness and whining of the females within our clan.
Yes, it's supposed to go up to 28C today. I'm sure I'll be turning Flo on several times.
Donnnnnnnnn:
If you're isolated, why NOT believe?
And yes, I'm a packrat. But why throw out any of my nuts when they could come in handy some day?
I'm sure it is the other way around: the females are cheeky and whining in response to the smart ass males.
ReplyDeleteAh, to get turned on several times a day..... lucky girl, that Flo!
PG:
ReplyDeleteThe chicken and egg scenario, huh? Whatever. Women love to be teased, so we evolved into teasers.
Go figure.
I'm not sure if Flo would turn you on, actually. I've heard there are other mechanical devices available. (*Runs away laughing*)
WW: We women have the egss, so you males must be the chickens.... ha ha ha!
ReplyDeleteI was actually saying that Flo was the lucky one.... not thinking at all that she would turn ME on.... (she's not my type...) and those other mechanical devices actually come in handy during a long 'dry' spell. ((smiles knowingly but with sadness))
From the looks of her, you must like 'em tall and leggy but stacked on top, eh!?!?
I distinctly remember commenting here. Infact I was the first commenter! Did you eat it up?
ReplyDeleteI would of been inclined to of kiss Florence and lobbed her in the skip LMFAO
ReplyDeletex