The Family (Or most of them)

The Family (Or most of them)
The Family

April 5, 2008

MY HAIR (and other unimportant issues)


I generally don't make much of a fuss about how I look.

I don't buy any of the latest fashions, I struggle to clip my nose hairs and ear hairs, I'm not picky about keeping my nails cut every week.

I'm a walking fashion disaster who wears jeans and a t-shirt almost every single day during the winter and shorts, sandals and a t-shirt every single day of the summer.

For those Nitpicky Nellies or Nigels among you, in the spring and fall I wear whatever I can get away with that's appropriate for the weather.

My thing is comfort, not culture. Fusion, not fashion.

But when it comes to my thinning hair, that's another thing entirely.

I wash it the same way and brush it the same way, every single day. And when it's not right -- or as right as I can make it at the best of times -- I freak.

I don't use any goop or any conditioners. It's naturally curvy or wavy or whatever, and long ago I found out what it naturally likes to do. And that's whatever it wants to.

So I went with the flow, so to speak, and found a style that I've lived with most of my life.

And when I go to get my hair cut, I tell them the same thing all the time and I want it cut the same way, all the time.

And I'm not a very organized person. I don't make haircut appointments every six or eight weeks in advance, because of my work schedule -- and just because I don't think ahead.

I think in the here and now. I'm impulsive.

On Wednesday, my hair was OK. On Thursday, it wasn't. So I needed to get it cut.

So imagine my horror when I tried to make an appointment on Thursday with Ashley, my "hair girl," for Friday or Saturday.

All booked up, she said (she's very cute and she can cut hair well...what can I say?)

I called my backup "hair girl," Barb, who charges a lot more but whose place offers massages while you're waiting and then hair massages before she cuts.

Every time I've gone there, she talks about her other business in construction (snore...)

All booked up, she said.

There's another few places I've been to around here in such dire circumstances, but at one, they barely speak English and at the other, they once cut my ear.

So I set out Saturday on a multi-faceted, high-risk mission:

Get my income tax done, mail some bills, pick up some new cutlery to replace the stuff my daughter takes to work and loses, hopefully get a new camera battery...

And, if possible, get my hair cut.

Almost certainly I forgot several things, but who's counting?

After finding out I'd be getting a lot less back from the government from my income tax file than I had hoped, I remembered a place two doors down in that strip mall. I went inside.

"Are you Dennis?", one of the stylists asked me.

"No, but you can call me Dennis if you want," I replied with a smile. "I'm Chris. I haven't made an appointment but I came in on the off-chance you could cut my hair."

"We're waiting for someone named Dennis to show up for his appointment," she said. "I'm Anne. We can take you in right away."

So Anne, who has a space between her two front teeth just like me, cut my hair.

And she did an OK job, because I hate getting my hair cut.

I always let it grow too long and I wait until the last second to get it cut again, only when it gets unbearable for me...kind of like pulling rotten teeth.

Anne was very pleasant. She's from Kazakhstan in what used to be Russia in what used to be the Soviet Union but she moved here when she was a child.

We talked about the stabbing at the supermarket down the street a couple of weeks ago, about my bald spots, about what I do for a living...

And about how some people are incredibly organized and how some people, like me, do everything at the last minute.

My hair is short again. I gave her a $2 tip. I'm happy, she's happy.

But I still don't have my camera battery, otherwise I would have probably attached before and after pictures. Instead, I've used these other pix from years gone by.


Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton were within my grasp Friday night.

Actually, they were less than two hours away -- in Grand Forks, North Dakota, U.S. of A., both appearing at a Democratic Party something or other.

I had given some thought to actually going down there just to see them. But I had to work.

For my money, as I said months ago, Obama's the guy. I think he IS the saviour of the U.S. and the rest of the free world.

I thought for sure, initially, that Hillary would win. But I think she tried too much to be like a man, which clearly she is not.

Her popularity was at its highest when she was more vulnerable, open and sensitive like the woman she is.


My daughter finally got voicemail capability on her fancy-schmancy cellphone.

And right at the end of her new little recorded message to all who call her, she says, "and Dad, only leave a message if you really have to get a hold of me."

You see, I have a habit of calling her just to see how she's doing or what's new. And that is like slow, painful death to a teenager, coming from their father.

Sometimes, I actually pass on critical information that she absolutely MUST respond to, such as that I love her or I want to tell her a joke or something or to find out when she wants me to pick her up from work.

And all this time that she hasn't had voicemail, and I couldn't leave messages just to torture her or otherwise, she's had to phone me back just to find out why I called her in the first place.

So I called her Saturday, expecting to get her voicemail on a day she's usually working. Lo and behold, she answered.

Of course, I teased her about her voicemail message as she was trying to eat lunch with a girl she's going to Europe with for two months at the end of this month.

I bothered her for as long as I could before we said goodbye.


My son, who had been carrying on a long-distance phone/internet relationship with a girl who lives seven hours north of here, has abandoned that and now has a new girlfriend who actually attends his school.

I'm driving them, tonight, to a movie, and then picking them up.

There's hope for him yet.


  1. Hair the man does not make....

    However, after looking at all the pictures of you, I think I like the wild and curly look the best. ;-)

  2. Anne has a space like yours between her teeth?

    Did she hold the bobby pins in there while she styled your hair?

  3. This was great -- like a "life upodate" chat over Starbucks. I love your descriptions of your relationship with your daughter and too bad about the Thompson Girl. Big check mark from me on Obama, too. If Hill becomes president I'd have to turn her off every time I heard her just because I find her voice so absolutely grating, but that's beside the point -- I think Obama has vision for a floundering country. They need him.

    As for you haircut, I have a 13 year old with a gap in his teeth and a $2 pair of kitchen scissors. Just call ahead to make sure he's not booked up.

  4. upodate -- that's a good word. Must remember it.

  5. Im so like you LMFAO....... I only get me hair cut when me maties say 'Mel ya hair is wild get it cut' lol... and yep, mine to has a natural curl so I tend to just get it sort of layered or whatever the heck its called.... I think Ive been living with sons way to long... I to mostly only wear jeans and a top, and Im an organised mess LOL..... oh well, there is more to life then all that rubbish.... except I DONT have a bald spot....

    I love the story of you and your girl... Im a little like that with me lads and they live with me lmfao..... and boys aye *rolling me eyes* boys and their girlfriends, sometimes its way to hard to keep up..... so I dont :)


  6. Ponygirl:

    Ha! But when you're losin' it, and it's reappearing in strange places like your ears, it becomes a valuable commodity...

    As far as wild and curly goes, I've become very staid and conservative in my getting to be golden years...


    Didn't you know it's dangerous to put bobby pins in your mouth?


    As an upodate on the big date involving my son, I had to do all the talking in the car, she's a bit shy and they're nervous Nellies with me.

    When I shut up, there was nothing but silence, so I blared the music (Us and Them) and then they actually started talking to one another...

    I'll book your son next time around. He has a bowl too that you'll let him use, I assume...

    Marmite Toasty:

    An organized mess, huh? A true contradiction with truth to it, no doubt...

    See, that's one of life's injustices, how women don't get bald spots but men do...

    Oh, the horror...

  7. Golden years???? You're barely past the half way mark, man! And only a couple years older than me.... golden, my ass. Personally, I think we all get kinda tarnished as we get older. I am starting to get a little silver on the top....

    If you want, I could take my horse clippers to your head and then you wouldn't have to worry about the wild look at all... and for free, too!

  8. If ya have hair growing out ya ears you could always comb it up and over and have a 'combover' LOL.... hey, its just a thought ;)


  9. If and when you make it to Montreal, you must go see my "hair girl" (she's a woman, really) Rrrrrrraquel for a haircut. She is the BEST! But I'll have to accompany you because she doesn't speak a word of English - only French and Spanish.

    I love the end of your daughter's message - I laughed - very cute. And how wonderful for her to be going to Europe for a couple of months! Where in Europe? I hope she has an amazingly wonderful adventure!

    As for your son, I suspect he's a lot like you were at his age - goofy, but with a huge heart. I hope this new relationship is more fulfilling for him.

    Also, I just want to say that I love MJ's comments - she always cracks me up.

  10. Anna: When we've got WW to work with, who could ask for better material?


  11. Here we go...
    a fascinating glimpse (upodate) into your personal hygiene.

    I got spammed good and hard by some psychotic twat from Downunda so be on the lookout...check out my second last post for details.
    I made the mistake of taking him on at another Blog that he was infiltrating.

    I am so f*cking mad that if I could hop on a plane and 'rectify' the sitch I would..even though he is just some pathetic middle aged dumbass psychopath living in a fantasy world...dammit anyway I prolly wouldn't be able to stay mad after spending 13 hours on a plane.

    He should be an object of my pity and not my scorn but the hell with that...he wins round one because now I have to use comment moderation.

    Anyway, congratulations on another sensitive but marginally 'unkept' male posting.
    Please do go on...

  12. It was good to catch up on what's been happening with you. :D

  13. how frustrating not to be able to see your usual hair girl, i know how guys are over their hair no matter how they protest! glad you found a temporary replacement...

    as for the phone thing, damien gives me regular flak for phoning him too often!

  14. Ponygirl:

    Barely past the halfway 100? No way I'm livin' that long!

    I figure if I make it to 75, I'm doin' pretty bring on the horse clippers!

    Would they work on my nosehairs (Yecccch)


    Good idea! I'll try it! Anne told me that, unfortunately she could not help me in that department...


    I am fluent in Spanish and French, so Rrrrrrrraquel and I will be able to Conquistadore...

    Buenos Dias and Bonjour, et vous?

    I think my female offspring is destined for England, Italy, France, Germany and Greece.

    They've changed their desto's a few times. I'm taking her out for dinner and cutting her a cheque to help out, so I'll find out and will possibly post about it...

    Hey,'re callin' me goofy? Now, or then?

    Yes, I can always trust MJ to perk up with the lighter side of things, but she's a gem...


    Ha ha ha ha!!! Where's ur ass so I can kick it?

    Homer Escapeons, aka Donn:

    What IS this preoccupation you've got with electronically generated spam? Get over it!

    Or any other spam, human or otherwise. It's life in the fast lane, buddy. Suck it up!

    And who's unkempt!


    Thanks for checkin' in. I'll be around sometime in the next while to breathe in that hot air (I didn't mean you! I meant Manila!)


    What, and women don't fret and fuss over THEIR hair??? My daughter spends entire historical eras straightening her's.

  15. I think the horse clippers would do a tad more damage to your nose than your own little razor.... probably lop chunks off.... not a good look I am sure. Better stick to something a little smaller... the hair I can do anytime, though!

  16. Stumbled in here via Guatami. You have a cool site!

  17. Man, you got more hairy tales than I ever did with my mid-thigh length completely black STRAIGHT hair!

    All I have ever done is, massage it with olive oil once a week and snip a few inches (all by myself!) every few weeks...

  18. Ponygirl:

    I dunno, I've done some substantial damage to myself with my own razor...


    Thanks for comin' by!


    When your hair's down past your butt, well of course it's easy to cut!

    And you've already given me the olive oil long is your hair now?


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