THIS BEING A POLITICALLY CORRECT AND GENDER-NEUTRAL BLOG, I HAVE TAKEN A DECISIVE STEP IN THE INTERESTS OF SEXUAL EQUALITY.
First, if only as a token gesture, the type is in pink, showing my feminine side.
Second, I am wearing high heels and dark red lipstick as I write it, which I normally wear only for Homo Escapeons.
This post is a sequel to the one before it and both, including comments, should be read to understand the need for the sequel.
The original talked about how I was thinking, and as such focused on my male brain.
But some females -- regular visitors, but also new ones -- wondered about shoes, knitting yarn and other feminine things they could not find on my male brain diagram.
Some wondered what THEIR brains might look like, similarly dissected and analysed.
Others made huge leaps and assumptions, some even referring to how they regularly accomplish world domination of males by strategically using parts of their female brains.
All, in my view, seemed to feel excluded from the process as I simply scratched my head and thought, only with my male brain, which some would say has its limitations.
Today, I have commissioned the brain surgeons who operate my blog to design an illustration of the human female brain that could be compared on an equal basis with the male brain.
Without further comment, snickers, laughter, sneering, sexual arousal or any other show of emotion or opinion, I now reveal, in the interests of equality for both genders, the male AND female brains.
At the moment, we see no need for a prequel, but we reserve that right in the future.
"Second, I am wearing high heels and dark red lipstick as I write it, which I normally wear only for Homo Escapeons." Pictures or it never happened, LOL.
ReplyDeleteI must say, I liked this post, and I have to wonder about the brains of the male back in the 1970's...my unlces all wore those high heeled stiletto boots you know..and I wonder if there was a change in the 1980's in their brains, when they ceased to wear such things. Also, is there another change about to happen? Because, fashion is such a cyclical thing, and those shoes may be able to come out of the moth balls now.
Cazzie!!!
ReplyDeleteWelcome...I'll check for pictures, but you're right, it probably didn't happen...
And I'll have to consult the historians, but I don't think males had brains in the 70s.
I believe that the "I told you so" gland is entirely misrepresented. It obviously isn't large enough :). (yes, yes, I'm being harsh on my own sex).
ReplyDeleteHey, that's pretty good! Maybe you should add "manipulation through tears".
ReplyDeleteI wish you would reconsider your choice of lipstick colors. I think you'd look better in a coral shade or possibly light pink.
ReplyDeleteI have to say, though, I think my brain is alot more male than female. I don't care for shoes, unless they are boots or good tennis shoes, I rarely if ever wear jewelry and have never watched a soap opera in my life. And I rarely, if ever, get headaches and I certainly wouldn't use one as an excuse for not having s-e-x.
On the other hand, I do enjoy some rather dangerous pursuits and ball sports and my ironing center is at least as small as yours, if not smaller.
You know why womens' toilet cleaning gland is so small? Because mens' toilet aiming gland is even tinier.
ReplyDeleteI live in a home with three males, and I'm always telling them: "I aim to please. You aim too, please."
I'm pretty much with Laurie on this one. Women schwomen!
ReplyDelete**it, which I normally wear only for Homo Escapeons.
ReplyDeleteok now I know why HE likes the song 'Under Pressure' so much.
How abt adding 'get lost Richard Cranium' gland?
:)
Keshi.
You missed the random explosion gland, the "if the dont know im not telling you logic genrator".
ReplyDelete"I am wearing high heels and dark red lipstick as I write it,"
Any photos? there for a "friend"
I couldn't get past the image of you in drag.
ReplyDeleteAllow me to practice deep breathing, and I shall be back.
Lee:
ReplyDeleteOK, you'll have to live with that statement for the rest of your life...
Menchie:
Good one! I'll fire my brain surgeons for omitting that one...
Laurie:
I doubt your ironing gland is as small as mine, really...now I have to return to All My Children...
Ms. Val:
I don't think men have a toilet aiming gland. We evolved to just pee outside in the grass.
Why would we need one? (I'm assuming toilets are a female invention)
Stace:
Oh, c'mon! Play along!
Keshi:
Yes, HE is easily pleased...who's Richard Cranium? I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually. Remember, I'm still thinking...
Aidan:
Another missed gland by my blog employees. More will be fired. Good one, mate.
Awaiting:
Did you hyper-ventilate? OK, I confess. I do not wear high heels and lipstick for HE.
I'll come back when I've sobered up.
ReplyDeleteI just mistakenly read that you're wearing heels and lipstick.
i'm with laurie -go the coral shade - you won't look like such a tart that way.
ReplyDeleteMJ:
ReplyDeleteYeah, you're seeing double. I didn't really say that...at least not without my tongue in my cheek.
Lee:
Thanks...always count on a woman to provide advice on lipstick shade. But am I a spring, a summer, a winter or a fall?
dark red lipstick? You TART!
ReplyDeleteMissed Lee's comment because I was in such a hurry to get to the bottom and add my thoughts - sorry to be repetitive you old tart you.
ReplyDeleteZiggi:
ReplyDeleteGeez, what is it with this innocent little lipstick/high heels comment?
What happened to the topic at hand: a comparison of the male/female brains?
Apparently, my passing reference mixing the two has drawn more attention...yes, I'm a tart...
I'm with MJ, except for the being not sober part.
ReplyDeleteHildie:
ReplyDeleteWhat? You're actually sober?
(Just kiddin'. All in fun)
Still talking about sex?
ReplyDeleteOh I forgot to ask - what shade of red lipstick? Was it True Red, Very Berry, Red Wine, Bright Red...
ReplyDeleteCes:
ReplyDeleteOnly in the interests of gender equity and to entertain you.
Berry Red.
Berry Red? You're much more of a "fall," I'm afraid. Try some coppery sheen with gold highlights and then match your shoes to it.
ReplyDeleteI recommend for you a cocktail dress like the ONE (and only one) Man Coulter wears to conferences where she calls Democratic Senators "faggots."
Top that off with a light knitted shawl in earth tones and you've got a winner!
you are all nuts!
ReplyDeleteLaura
Shelley:
ReplyDeleteStrangely enough, I DO have copper shoes, so I'll try that. Except it's almost spring. Will that go?
I have no idea who Coulter is, but I'll google her. Gotta have that dress!
Finally, I'm assuming you'll knit the shawl for me?
Laura:
I don't understand the statement.
Was it:
1. "Y'all nuts," as in African American slang?
2. "You're ALL nuts," referring just to me?
3. "You're all NUTS," referring to everyone who commented on this post?
Shelley:
ReplyDeleteOh, THAT Coulter! But which cocktail dress?